


This Endless And Hopeless March (How Can I Make It Stop?)

by ahegaotyun



Series: of angels and devils [1]
Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Ahegao, Angel Corruption, Angel Hueningkai, Angel/Demon Relationship, Corruption, Corruption Kink, Cuddling & Snuggling, Devil Soobin, Dominant Soobin, Kissing, M/M, Naked Cuddling, Sharing Clothes, Sharing a Bed, Shy Hueningkai, Sir Kink, Submissive Hueningkai, Whipped Choi Soobin, chubby hueningkai, handjob, handjobs, kai calls soobin sir for literally no reason, kinkbox
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:07:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27830482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahegaotyun/pseuds/ahegaotyun
Summary: he’s an angel.they throw him on the stone floor, and he flinches when his knees hit the ground, face contorting in pain. they laugh.he’s an angel, and he’s crying.or, hueningkai is an angel who escapes from heaven, and soobin is the literal king of hell
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Huening Kai
Series: of angels and devils [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036923
Comments: 14
Kudos: 160





	This Endless And Hopeless March (How Can I Make It Stop?)

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this for kinkbox on twt but i am SO late i’m so sorry
> 
> title from eng trans of lyrics from angel or devil by txt ofc

he’s an angel.

they throw him on the stone floor, and he flinches when his knees hit the ground, face contorting in pain. they laugh.

he’s an angel, and he’s crying.

they surround him, poking, pinching, pulling; he flinches, hands twitching as if he wants to defend himself but is too afraid to move more than a centimetre. his shoulders shakes with sobs, but he is quiet.

soobin frowns.

“what is this?” he says quietly, the hall immediately falling silent as he speaks. the “this” he’s referring to is the whole situation, why this being is cowering on the floor of the great hall of his castle, in front of his throne, as his subjects harass the poor thing.

“an angel, sire,” responds one of them, one of the ones who had brought the angel in; thrown him on the floor like he was nothing.

“i was not referring to him,” soobin says, after a moment of contemplation, where he makes sure to stare unwaveringly at the person who spoke, making them shift uncomfortably. “i was asking you what on earth this boy has done to warrant being thrown on the floor of my castle like a sack of potatoes?”

silence.

yeonjun, his manservant - although he spends less time serving him and more time testing his patience - snorts from where he’s leaning against the side of soobin’s throne. soobin thinks he hears him mutter “idiots” under his breath, and he suppresses a smile.

“well, i - he’s an angel, you see, sire, i - we thought-”

“you thought what?” soobin interrupts, voice dangerously low. “you thought it would be appropriate to harass, and abuse him simply because he does not originate from our realm?”

he’s met with a gaping mouth; wide, terrified eyes; unable to listen to another stuttered excuse, soobin waves his hand lazily, sighing as the - now, sheepish looking - crowd surrounding the angel disappears.

“you went easy on them,” yeonjun remarks, blowing a bubble the size of his face and making a disgruntled noise when it pops all over his chin. soobin snorts and gets rid on the mess with a flick of his finger. yeonjun winks at him in thanks.

the small exchange is interrupted by a quiet sniffle from below, and soobin’s attention is drawn once more to the figure huddled at the foot of his throne. he’s pure white, of course: white clothing, white wings tucked protectively against his back. even the tears he cries are bright, shining silver in the dim light of the room. the boy’s hands, resting in his lap, are shaking uncontrollably, and now that soobin is paying attention, he can hear the way the angel’s breaths stutter, so clearly being desperately muffled; the poor thing is trying so hard not to draw attention to himself.

soobin stands, and the angel flinches, a quiet whimper quickly cut short cutting through the air. slowly, soobin steps forward, and kneels, coming almost face to face with the angel - almost, because the boy’s head and shoulders are ducked, curled down so much it looks painful.

“raise your head,” soobin commands quietly. the boy’s fists clench, and he sobs, clearly scared out of his wits - but he raises his head anyway, and soobin’s breath catches as he takes in the way the dim light of the torches flickering on the walls dances across the angel's tear filled eyes.

“jesus, you’re scaring the poor boy shitless, soobin.”

the boy in question startles, gasping, scandalised gaze turning to where soobin knows yeonjun will have draped himself over soobin’s throne in his short absence.

“oops,” comes yeonjun’s voice again, entirely unapologetic. “that’s two whole sins - using the lord’s name in vain, and swearing. guess i’m going to hell! oh, wait.”

soobin closes his eyes momentarily at the way yeonjun breaks off into giggles, clearly finding himself hilarious. the boy clearly disagrees; he’s managing to look affronted and terrified at the same time. his hands are still shaking.

“i’m not planning on hurting you, you know.” soobin murmurs, opting to ignore yeonjun. the angel’s eyebrows furrow, just slightly, and the corners of soobin’s lips turn up in amusement. “did you think i was going to?”

the angel's lips part, but no sound comes out. he swallows, hard; takes one deep, shaky breath. then, another.

another.

“okay, let’s try something else,” soobin says, when it’s clear the boy isn’t able to answer. “what is your name, angel?”

the boy flinches. confused, soobin wonders if, perhaps, sharing one’s name with the devil is forbidden in heaven (on reflection, he would be surprised if it wasn’t), but the boy answers before he can think more on it.

“kai kamal huening.”

his voice is quiet, almost inaudible, and yeonjun obnoxiously says “huh?” behind him, causing the boy - kai - to flinch once more. he repeats himself, louder this time, before soobin can tell yeonjun to get lost.

“huh. weird name.” yeonjun muses, and soobin sighs.

“don’t you have things to be getting on with, yeonjun?” he says without turning around. he hears a snort.

“yeah, yeah. i’ll leave you alone with your precious angel.” then, there’s a short gust of wind, and soobin knows yeonjun has disappeared judging by the lack of obnoxious bubble-popping behind him, coupled with kai’s startled expression, fixed on the now empty throne behind him.

“hey,” soobin says, reaching up to guide kai back to face him with a finger on his cheek. kai stiffens, eyes widening, breathing turning shallow once more; another tear escapes the corner of his eye, shimmering as it slides down his face.

“shhh, angel, no need to cry. i said i wasn’t going to hurt you, didn’t i?” soobin whispers, moving closer infinitesimally.

“you said you weren’t planning to. plans can change.”

soobin raises his eyebrows, not expecting that response - or any verbal response.

“you’re right,” he says, after a short pause. “let me rephrase, then. i’m not going to hurt you. unless you decide to attack me first, of course.”

“i won’t,” kai says, voice still quiet, but, suddenly, firm. “that’s not - i’m not here to hurt anyone.”

“then why are you here?”

the question hangs in the air. soobin quirks an eyebrow, waiting patiently, as kai appears to struggle with words, mouth opening and closing repeatedly.

then, finally -

“i just couldn’t stay there anymore.”

and, oh, the admission seems to break him. his shoulders crumple once more, eyes closing, tears leaking down his face. he looks so small; so broken, and soobin hates himself in some small part for thinking that he really is so pretty like this.

“why?” he asks simply, wanting to reach out to the angel once more, but afraid it would scare him further.

“i …” kai hesitates, eyes opening, searching; he looks so lost, and soobin’s self control breaks clean in half.

“tell me,” he says, moving forwards so their knees touch, reaching a hand up to rest against the side of kai’s face; as expected, the angel stiffens at first, eyes widening - and then - then, he seems to melt, eyes closing once more as he leans his face into soobin’s hand, his own moving up to clutch at soobin’s wrist desperately. he lets out a breath, one that sounds as if he’s been holding it in for a long, long time.

“it’s so - _suffocating_ ,” kai begins, voice no more than a whisper. “up there. i can barely breathe. everywhere i go, everything i do, every - step, every word, every breath - it’s all _wrong_. sinful. this is the first time i’ve spoken more than three words at once in - in a month, because every time i speak - i can't say _anything_ without someone telling me it’s wrong, i’m wrong, i’m dirty, i’m sinful, i - i can’t, i can’t do it anymore, please, i - let me breathe, _please_ -”

leaning forward, soobin leads kai’s head to rest in the crook of his neck with a gentle hand around the back of kai’s, and kai - he shudders, letting out a heart wrenching sob that sounds almost painful, settling against soobin’s chest and clutching at his arms like he hadn’t been held in -

forever.

“shhhh,” soobin soothes, hand beginning to stroke kai’s hair slowly. “it’s okay, it’s alright. you’re not there anymore. you’re here now. you never have to go back, angel, it’s-”

“please don’t call me that,” comes kai’s muffled voice from soobin’s shoulder, and - oh.

“of course. i should have realised. i’m sorry, precious.”

faintly, soobin hears kai’s breath catch, and he pulls away to see red spreading across his cheeks.

“i suppose ‘precious’ is acceptable, then?” soobin asks, amused.

“i - i suppose,” kai says in a small voice. soobin guides him back to rest against his chest, and kai going willingly, burying his face there, still sniffling.

“well, then, precious, i suppose that means you’ll be wanting to find a home down here, hm?”

“i …” kai’s voice is quiet, muffled; soobin thinks he clutches into soobin tighter. “i was hoping that that would be … okay.”

soobin huffs out a breath of laughter, an amused smile playing at his lips.

“i think i will be able to arrange something.”

* * *

over the next few weeks, kai becomes - attached to soobin.

soobin had had a room cleared out for him in the castle, spacious, with a stunning view of the royal gardens, but when he had attempted to usher kai inside, he’d found himself with a shy, still shaking boy clinging onto his arm.

“kai? this is your room.” soobin had said, faintly amused. kai avoided his eyes.

“...do i have to stay here?” he said in a small voice, red dusting his cheeks.

“ah,” soobin responded - of course, the poor boy would be terrified to stay in the home of the king of hell after living in heaven for his entire life. “of course. i will call somebody to escort you to some temporary accommodation outside the castle before you find somewhere more perman-”

“no!” kai interrupted, face turning even redder when he realised what he had done; soobin simply stared at him in shock: nobody ever dared to interrupt him. “sorry. i just - i’ll just stay in this room, it’s fine. thank you.”

the boy had stepped forwards slowly, hands sliding down soobin’s arm until he could no longer cling on. he was still blushing, head ducked, arms outstretched to hold onto soobin for as long as possible - and soobin realised.

he grabbed kai’s hand, making his head snap up, eyes wide.

“would you like to stay with me in my quarters, precious?”

kai froze, a small gasp escaping lips.

“i - i wouldn’t want to intrude, s-sir.”

sir. that’s cute.

“that’s not what i asked.” soobin said softly, thumb gently caressing the back of kai’s hand. kai’s mouth opens. he hesitates.

“if - if it’s not inappropriate, or - i mean, yes, if that’s - i don’t want to be a bother, but if you’re offering, then-”

“i am offering.” stepping forwards, soobin relinquished his grasp on kai’s wrist, and instead wrapped a protective arm around his waist, pulling him close. after only a second’s hesitance, kai sunk into soobin’s side, hands reaching up to grip onto the material of soobin’s shirt.

“come, precious.”

that night, kai had settled shyly onto soobin’s bed, uttering in a small voice that it was his first time sharing a bed with somebody - back home, it was considered promiscuous, and, therefore, sinful - and asked if he was doing it right - _is it okay if i just - lay here -? i won’t get too close, if that’s what you’d_ _prefer_ -

“on the contrary,” soobin said matter-of-factly, unbuttoning his shirt. “please do.”

he had revelled in the way kai’s eyes widened, face turning the reddest soobin’s seen it since he arrived. the poor boy hid behind his hands as soobin changed, making soobin laugh quietly. how did he end up with such a precious little thing in his bed?

“don’t you want something to change into?” soobin inquired.

“i … if you have something, then that would be - i mean, only if it’s okay with you, sir.”

soobin breathed out slowly. if kai kept calling him _sir_ , well -

grabbing one of his largest night shirts from his drawer, soobin slowly crawled onto the bed, settling in front of kai, who was still hiding behind his hands. gently, he took hold of kai’s wrists and pulled them down, hearing his breathing speed up, waiting for -

“sir!”

kai’s eyes went wide for a split second before clamping shut, having taken in the sight of soobin’s extremely bare chest. his face was practically a beacon, it was so red, and soobin was almost taken over with the urge to kiss the - no doubt, burning hot - skin.

“it’s okay, precious, no need to be embarrassed. there’s nothing wrong, it’s just me.”

slowly, he guided one of kai’s hands to his shoulder, carefully observing the way younger’s expression changed - the furrowed brow, the parted lips as he gasped.

“it’s okay,” soobin whispered once more, trailing kai’s hand sideways, across his collarbones - another gasp, stuttered breathing - before moving it down, over his chest; his abdomen.

“s-sir, i …”

“yes, precious?”

kai swallowed. “are you sure this is okay? it’s not - bad? i’m not-”

he cut himself off, chest shuddering, face screwing up slightly. he swallowed again, and then again, clearly holding back tears, and soobin’s heart broke.

“yes, precious, yes. i’m sure. it’s okay. this is okay; what we’re doing is okay. it’s allowed. it’s not bad; you’re not bad, you’re perfect, my sweet.” the words spilled out, and soobin only took a second to marvel at the way he’s never, in his life, even had the urge to speak this affectionately to anyone, before kai’s eyes fluttered open, wide and shining.

“okay,” he whispered. “okay.”

a pause. he swallowed, again. then, slowly, very slowly, he reached for the hem of his sweater, pulling his wrists out of soobin’s grip. soobin’s eyes widened infinitesimally, eyebrows twitching upwards. then, all at once, kai’s sweater was on the bed, and the boy was kneeling there, shaking, in front of soobin, completely bare from the waist up - discounting the white feathers that rested artfully in his hair.

“precious…”

however, it seemed the boy wasn’t done; he stood quickly, eyes fixed on some point in front of where soobin knelt, and, in one swift movement, slid down his trousers, stepping out of them and kicking them away. he stood there, breathing hard, hands shaking by his sides - completely, entirely naked.

“it’s okay,” he whispered, as soobin stared in shock. “it’s okay. it’s not bad. i’m not bad. i’m not dirty. i’m not tainted. i’m okay, it’s okay…”

“oh, precious …” soobin murmured, unable to hold back any longer, and moved forwards, reaching for the trembling boy in front of him; the words seemed to snap kai out of whatever headspace we was in, and he lurched forwards to meet soobin in the middle, collapsing into his lap and curling around him, deep, shuddering breaths wracking his body.

“please don’t ever make me go back,” he said eventually, words muffled as he spoke them into soobin’s shoulder.

“never, my sweet thing,” soobin reassured him, holding him close as he carefully reclined back onto the mattress, bringing the heavy blanket over the both of them, and they fell asleep like that, bare skin pressed against each other - honest, unashamed, pure.

* * *

morning comes.

soobin watches kai’s eyes flutter open, blinking sleepily as they focus, attempting to make sense of his surroundings. a fond smile settles on soobin’s face as he sees kai’s expression shift from dazed to confused to surprised to - shy, endlessly shy, cheeks pink and eyes downcast. the older simply continues faintly tracing the soft bumps on kai’s back where his wings would sprout from if he were to conjure them.

“good morning, precious,” soobin murmurs, and kai manages to meet his eyes, albeit hesitantly. he’s curled up in soobin’s arms, his own arms tucked between his body and soobin’s, and it makes him seem smaller than he is.

he’s still naked.

“good morning, sir,” he whispers. soobin exhales through his nose; long.

after a short pause, he asks.

“why do you call me ‘sir’?” kai’s eyes widen, lips parting slightly. “oh, i - i’m sorry, is it rude? i’ve never really met anyone of your - status, so i didn’t-”

“shhh, precious, it’s okay,” soobin laughs quietly, fondly, and kai’s mouth snaps shut. “i’m not going to - tell you off. yes, anybody else would likely be scolded for addressing me so - informally, however, you are a special case, my sweet.”

“...oh.”

another short laugh escaping his mouth, soobin slowly reaches up to push a wayward strand of hair off of kai’s face with one finger, before moving his hand back down to its previous position, resuming its gentle stroking. kai shivers.

“what should i call you instead?” he asks in a small voice, still looking slightly nervous. soobin hums. his eyes trace kai’s face, jumping from feature to feature, marvelling at the soft beauty of him. he shrugs.

“if it’s you, i don’t mind. just soobin would be fine - or, if you prefer, feel free to continue calling me ‘sir.’ whatever you are comfortable with, precious.”

slowly, a small, shy smile forms on kai’s lips and he presses his face halfway into the pillow, shuffling closer to soobin.

“i like calling you ‘sir.’ makes me feel like you’ll protect me.”

bemused, soobin smiles down at the younger, who seems to have no intention of expanding on his statement. he snorts quietly.

“i will,” soobin murmurs, hand now tracing up and down kai’s spine, circling around the bump of his wings before dancing down the curve of his back.

 _i will_ , he says, and means it.

“besides,” kai mumbles, clearly halfway to sleep once again even as he tilts his head up to look soobin in the eye, a sparkle of mischief in his own. “you like it.”

soobin raises an eyebrow. “pardon me?”

kai reddens, but he doesn’t back down. “you like when i call you ‘sir.’ i've noticed. i just don’t know why.”

for a few seconds, soobin holds his gaze. the way kai is staring up at him, shy but teasing, causes something to stir deep in his stomach, and all soobin wants to do is grab ahold of him, firmly, gently, pull him close, and -

all at once, soobin rolls them over so that, instead of laying on their sides, soobin is hovering over kai, arms propping himself up on either side of his head. kai’s eyes widen, mouth popping open, lips parting so enticingly; soobin can’t help but stare.

“would you like me to explain to you why i like the way you address me, precious?” soobin says quietly, face barely an inch from kai’s. he can feel his skin, his breath, his heartbeat; it pounds against his ribcage, as does his own.

kai nods.

 _oh, how to explain to a (former) angel that when he calls you “sir” it makes you want to fuck him into the mattress_ -

 _start slow, soobin_.

“does your kind have - kissing, up there?” soobin asks after some deliberation. toning it down from sex to kissing seemed to have been the right choice, as kai lets out a little squeak; if his face wasn’t red before, it is now.

“i - well, i - suppose, but it’s - it’s unnecessary, it’s promiscuous, and it leads to all sorts of other sinful things-”

“kai, lovely,” soobin interrupts, and kai blinks, as if snapping out of a spell. “remember why you left.”

“i…”

“kissing isn’t wrong. it’s not sinful, or - promiscuous, precious. it’s just something people do when they like each other. something people do to feel good, with each other.”

kai’s eyebrows furrow. “to feel … good.” he repeats, as if the concept is entirely foreign to him, and perhaps it is, soobin realises.

“yes,” breathes soobin, eyes fixed on kai’s still-wide ones. “kissing makes you feel good. there’s nothing wrong with that. sex, too, in the right circumstances.”

and - kai gasps, _loudly_ , even choking slightly on - seemingly - his own spit, mouth open and gaping. he mouths words but no sound comes out for a small while; eventually, he seems to calm down a little, mouth closing, but his heartbeat is still rapid against soobin’s chest.

“are you okay, precious?” soobin asks when he’s sure kai isn’t going to burst a blood vessel.

“i - you - i-”

helplessly, soobin smiles, a short laugh escaping him as kai struggles for words. “take your time, little one.”

the new endearment seems to divert kai’s attention, and he looks flustered for a second, wide eyes darting up to soobin’s for just a second as he swallows nervously. he brings his hands up to curl over his chest, almost protectively, and soobin worries that he’s gone too far, before the hands curl tentatively over soobin’s shoulders.

precious.

“i’m sorry, i - i know that most of what i learnt back home was - not necessarily now things really are,” kai begins, avoiding soobin’s gaze. “i know that - just because they told me that certain things are wrong - well, that doesn’t mean they are. but … it’s hard - it’s hard to let go of a mindset that’s been carved into you for your entire life.”

gently, soobin lets his head tilt forwards until his forehead rests on kai’s, and they breathe the same air. “i know, precious, i know. i understand.”

a pause. he smirks.

“sir understands.”

“oh-!” kai exclaims, distracted all of a sudden from the clinging hands of his past teachings, and glares up at soobin, completely and utterly unmenacing.

“what does this have to do with why you like me calling you ‘sir’? you avoided the question. sir.”

soobin hums, nuzzling his nose just slightly into kai’s; readjusting the way his arms are positioned on either side of kai’s head, allowing their bodies to move together, just slightly. he doesn’t miss the hitch in kai’s breath.

“well … oh, how should i put this?”

soobin pauses, and kai looks up at him expectantly.

“when you call me ‘sir,’” soobin begins slowly. “it makes me … aroused.”

soobin watches kai carefully, expecting some sort of drastic reaction, similar to before, but kai only furrows his eyebrows.

“aroused...?”

 _oh, the poor, innocent little thing_.

“precious, when you call me ‘sir,’ it makes me want to have sex with you.” soobin says simply.

and, oh, there it is: the wide eyes, the newly flushed cheeks, the gaping mouth. kai blinks up at him, and soobin chides himself internally for _liking_ how clueless kai looks, how dumb - how _cute_.

“you - want - _me_ -?”

“yes, precious, i want to have sex with you. but this goes both ways - i would only act on these urges if you wanted me to. don’t worry, my lovely.”

soobin speaks in what he hopes is a soft, soothing voice, and kai does seem to calm down a little; his breaths are merely shaky instead of rapid, and comprehension seems to be dawning behind his eyes instead of pure disbelief. soobin smiles fondly, and lets him attempt to make sense of soobin’s statement.

“i…” kai begins quietly, hesitantly, after a few minutes, during which his breathing slows and his face turns pink instead of bright red. “you want to … do _that_ … with me, sir?”

immediately after speaking, his face returns to the same shade of red as before, the implications of calling soobin ‘sir’ now clear. soobin’s smile widens.

“only if you wish for it, darling.”

now - soobin does not, in any way, shape or form, expect kai to want to have sex with him - at least not yet, not so soon after leaving heaven. so, when kai looks up at him with a hesitant but anticipatory expression, and says in a small voice -

“you said it feels good, right?” -

as if he’s _considering_ it - well, soobin has to take a few seconds to collect himself, breath catching in his throat as he stares down at kai’s open expression, pretty, pretty eyes wide and trusting.

soobin exhales.

“with me, it does.” he whispers into the space between their mouths, and watches kai shiver.

* * *

they don’t have sex that morning.

soobin introduces things - _gradually_ , when kai asks for them. that morning, kai had blushed and stuttered and squirmed against soobin’s body, almost begging for soobin to pin him in place against the mattress -

but that’s all. after all, soobin has duties to attend to, and kai isn’t ready to partake in such _sinful_ things just yet. in the meantime, he sticks by soobin’s side, shy and clingy when other people are around, head ducked and body angled into soobin’s side; still shy but increasingly cheeky when only him and soobin are present, full of toothy grins and mischievous giggles. when soobin sits in his throne in the main hall, kai has taken to situating himself snugly in soobin’s lap, perfectly content with nuzzling his face into soobin’s neck as the older secures an arm firmly around his waist. soobin’s subjects look on with varying degrees of bemusement and suspicion. soobin ignores them all.

it’s after only a week of completing his usual duties with a particularly adorable addition clinging to his arm that kai whispers to him as they are settling down into bed, close, too close, that he’s been thinking a lot about what sir said a week ago, and how he might want to try one of the things he mentioned -

“only - only if it’s okay, but i was just thinking - maybe i could try k-kissing. with you.”

he’s completely red, as is to be expected when he mentions anything he’s been conditioned to think is sinful, and soobin can’t help but smile fondly at him as they lay face to face beneath the covers. after the first night of kai stripping naked, the younger had taken to wearing an old, soft shirt of soobin’s, hem reaching mid thigh, collar slipping halfway off his shoulder. soobin has taken to stroking gently over his outer thigh as they lay together after kai expressed, pink cheeked, how much he likes it. he inhales slowly, hand straying beneath the hem of kai’s (soobin’s) t-shirt.

“well, i’m absolutely okay with it, my darling. more than okay, in fact,” soobin says, voice low, holding kai’s wide eyed gaze.

“okay,” kai whispers, expression equal parts nervous and anticipatory. “okay. um. so, i - how do we-?”

soobin laughs quietly; fondly, at kai’s fumbling.

“let me teach you,” he murmurs, bringing a hand up to cradle kai’s face.

that night, soobin gets to experience the way, at first, kai freezes beneath soobin’s lips, eyes wide; the way he stutters out that he’d like to try again, if that’s okay - the way he hesitantly parts his lips as soobin kisses him for a second time, breath shaky; the way he squeaks as soobin loses himself for a second and rolls the younger onto his back, pushing him into the mattress - _i’m sorry, precious, i shouldn’t have - no, it’s okay, sir, i like it_ \- the way kai gradually opens up beneath him like a blooming flower, following soobin’s murmured instructions, allowing the older to kiss, suck, bite, all while he shakes beneath him, eyes closed with pleasure.

pleasure.

 _it’s a sin_ , kai’s mind reminds him.

 _shhhh, let me enjoy myself_ , kai responds, and curls a delicate hand around the back of soobin’s neck.

that night, they fall asleep, bodies entangled, lips swollen.

* * *

they kiss all the time, after that. in the morning, slow, sleepy; in the corridors, kai’s back pressed against the stone walls of the castle; in the main hall, soobin holding kai’s waist firmly as he reclines on his throne, kai squirming in his lap. most evenings, kai will wait patiently in bed for soobin to finish in the bathroom, making grabby hands for him as soon as he emerges - and what can soobin do if not indulge him? after all, the poor thing has been deprived of any and all pleasures for his entire life. it’s the least soobin can do to give him what he wants, now.

this evening, however, differs from the others; as soobin is washing his hands in the bathroom, he hears a strangled gasp through the door; furrowing his brows, he shakes his hands off, stepping toward the noise, then -

“sir - _help_ -”

kai’s panicked voice disrupts the quiet, and soobin runs, never mind his damp hands, finding kai sitting up in bed, eyes wide and scared.

“hey - precious, i’m here, it’s alright, tell me what happened,” soobin says, breathless, reaching out to take kai’s hands, expecting kai to _let_ him - but the younger simply clutches harder onto the blanket, holding it firmly up to his chest.

“precious? what is it, what’s wrong?” soobin asks once more, moving closer to the shaking boy. finally, kai responds.

“i … something’s wrong with me,” he whispers, voice barely audible. then, as soobin watches on, confused, he pulls he blanket away from his body just slightly, looks down, and squeaks, eyes squeezing shut. “go away, go away, why won’t it - why is it _doing_ that?”

“hey, darling, calm down, it’s alright,” soobin soothes the younger, who’s beginning to work himself up into a panic once more. he brings once hand up to stroke kai’s hair - and kai collapses into him, curling into his chest, one hand reaching up to grab into his t-shirt while the other keeps the blanket firmly in place.

“shhh, that’s it, calm down for me, alright, precious.”

soobin hears kai take a few deep, shaky breaths, body trembling, and he presses a kiss to his hair, hand carding through the strands gently.

“i don’t know what happened,” kai whispers, after some time. “i was just - thinking. in bed. about - things. and then it just went all…”

“what went all what, my darling?” soobin asks softly, choosing to ignore kai’s strangely vague words for now.

kai whines, pushing his face further into soobin’s chest. soobin is just about to offer words of reassurance to the younger once more, when, abruptly, the blanket is pushed down to below kai’s knees, and his t-shirt is lifted up to his stomach.

“ _this_ ,” kai says, voice pained.

“this” happens to be kai’s cock - fully hard, standing between kai’s trembling thighs. soobin feels his entire mouth dry out; his lips part as he takes in the soft skin of kai’s tummy; his thick thighs; his cute little cock, wet at the head. unconsciously, he tightens his arms around the younger, taking in a deep breath.

 _control yourself, soobin_.

“what … darling, what were you thinking about, exactly, when this … happened?” soobin manages to choke out, voice hoarse. kai sniffles into his chest.

“i … um, you know. what we usually do, when you come to bed. the - kissing, and stuff.”

“i see,” soobin just about managed to respond. kai, his precious, innocent little angel, had become hard just by imagining them kissing. he closes his eyes for a second, taking another deep breath.

“it’s bad, isn’t it? there’s something wrong with me, isn’t there? am i broken? is this what happens to angels after they-”

“hey, shhh, precious, no, no, no, darling, not at all, there’s nothing wrong, you’re not broken, my sweet,” soobin soothes, snapping out of his thoughts. his stroking of kai’s hair is interrupted when the younger sits up so that he’s able to look at soobin.

“help me, sir. i don’t know what’s happening to me.”

eyes shining with unshed tears, cheeks flushed, lips pouted, kai is a sight to behold, and soobin can barely hold himself back from pouncing on him then and there - but his darling is also hurting; so, so worried all for nothing, and soobin feels his heart break a little at the distressed look on his face.

“little one,” soobin allows a laugh to seep into his tone, keeping his expression open so that kai will know he isn’t laughing at him. “please, do not worry your pretty head. this is completely natural, alright?”

kai furrows his eyebrows. “natural?”

“yes,” soobin responds, reaching out to stroke over kai’s cheek. “it’s happened to me many times.”

kai’s lips part, and soobin’s eyes are immediately drawn to them. he watches as kai takes in the information, panic draining from his expression.

“but - is it gonna stay like this forever? how do i make it go back to normal?”

 _the things you do to me, my darling_ , soobin thinks as kai stares up at him, eyes shining with innocence.

“you …” soobin begins, trailing off as he considers how to word his sentence. “you have … a few options. one, you can simply wait, and it will go back to normal by itself. two, you can and stand in the shower on the coldest temperate and it will return to normal very quickly,” soobin huffs out a laugh at the way kai’s expression changes to one of distaste. “or … you can let me help you.”

“help me how, sir?” kai asks, tilting his head to the side. soobin smiles.

“i can touch you.” there’s a brief silence as soobin’s words sink in.

“touch me … there?”

soobin nods. “yes, darling.”

he watches as redness slowly seeps into kai’s cheeks; he watches the way kai’s throat bobs as he swallows and how he can’t meet soobin’s gaze; he watches as kai bites his lip, then lets it go; he watches as it springs back into place, pink and shining.

he watches as kai turns to look at him once more, cheeks rosy red, eyes wide and trusting, and says, “i want you to touch me, sir.”

soobin takes a moment to think about just how lucky he is.

“then lay down, my pretty darling, if you’re sure.” he responds quietly, revelling in the way kai follows his instructions immediately - so obedient. he settles on his back, t-shirt rumpled and still pulled up to his chest, soft stomach on full display. his thighs part slightly as he relaxes into the mattress. soobin wants to grab onto them; wants to grip tightly and watch the the way they bulge slightly between his fingers. he shuffles closer, positioning himself so he’s kneeling between kai’s legs. kai spreads his thighs wider to make room, and soobin exhales, mouth dry at the sight of kai spreading his legs for him.

there’s a moment of quiet as soobin takes kai in, eyes moving indulgently up and down his body, and kai simply lays there, pink cheeked, spread open and allowing soobin to observe him.

then, “i’m going to touch your cock now, precious.”

kai gasps quietly, eyes widening at soobin’s words. soobin watches him carefully for any sign of hesitance, but kai simply blinks up at him a few times, then nods, a small but clear movement.

“okay, sir.”

and then - kai kamal huening, pure, innocent, fallen angel, is touched for the first time.

immediately, kai’s hands curl into fists at his sides, knees turning inwards, lips parting in the tiniest little half-gasp-half-squeak. his eyes are fixed on the way soobin’s large hand wraps easily around his small length, not moving just yet - simply holding it, gauging kai’s reaction.

“okay, precious?” soobin asks quietly, unable to take his eyes off the blushing boy beneath him. kai’s wise eyes flick up to him once, then snap back to soobin’s hand around his cock as if unable to look away for more than a second.

“yes, sir,” he mumbles, voice small. “is - is this s-sex?”

soobin smiles fondly. “...we’re getting there,” he allows, enjoying kai’s loud swallow and little “oh,” in response. “would you still like to continue?”

kai’s gaze lands on him once more, this time surprised. “there’s more?”

 _oh … how precious_.

soobin’s smiles widens. “so much more.” he whispers. kai shivers.

“oh. okay, then, um … then, if it’s okay, can we please continue, sir?”

he’s blushing, the precious little thing, biting his lip as he avoids soobin’s eyes, instead choosing to focus on the hand around his cock. he seems transfixed, eyes wide, and soobin revels in the innocence of his gaze as he slowly, very slowly, moves his hand up kai’s cock and back down again. once again, kai gasps, thighs twitching; he looks up at soobin through his lashes, almost panicked, as if asking - _is it supposed to feel like this?_ soobin smiles at him reassuringly. _yes, precious. don’t worry._

soobin moves his hand again: up, then down, gradually working up a rhythm of stroking kai’s - now, leaking - cock. and, oh, kai is a sight to behold below him: blushing pretty pink, he’s squirming and gasping, thighs spreading open before closing tight around soobin’s wrist, needing a gentle hand to coax them open once again; and soobin does so, allowing himself a squeeze as he does, almost feeling his own cock harden at the way the fat gives under his palm; soft, malleable. kai’s stomach is the same, just slightly chubby, and soobin aches to hold onto its sides as he pulls kai towards him, spreading him open on his cock -

“s-sir, i - _oh, sir_ \- it - it feels so - w-why does it feel like - _ah_ \- like that?”

the poor thing can barely get a word out without stuttering, entire body shaking as his eyelids flutter his pleasure. he doesn’t know what to do with himself, soobin thinks: he’s never known pleasure like this; never known pleasure at all.

“shhh, my darling, no need to question it,” soobin soothes, watching kai’s overwhelmed expression carefully. “it’s completely natural to feel this way. it’s alright, precious.”

kai nods at soobin’s words, repeating them - “ _c-completely natural_ ” - quietly, as if to reassure himself. he’s taking - or, attempting to take - deep, shaky breaths: trying to calm himself down, perhaps, unused to being this out of control of his own body; not used to surrendering to such natural urges this way - and, maybe soobin’s a little selfish, because all he wants is to completely and utterly overwhelm his little angel with pleasure, drown him in it until he is gasping; no matter if he’s unused to it; no matter if he’s overwhelmed. soobin wants to see him moaning; screaming, tears clinging to his eyelashes as he writhes on the bedsheets, helpless.

all at once, soobin moves his hand faster.

not just a little faster: he, now using two hands, picks up the pace so that kai’s eyes fly open wide, having been sliding shut deliriously; his knees draw up to his chest as his entire body clenches, hands flying down to grip weakly at soobin’s wrists, instinctually attempting to push him off but unable to follow through in actuality. and, oh, the sound he makes: it’s lewd; shameless - or, it would be, if it wasn’t followed by kai’s mortified expression - he whines; high and breathy, the noise ringing through the room. soobin smiles smugly.

“ _sir_ \- w-what - _ah_ \- ngh- i, sir, i - _uh_ -”

all kai’s attempts to speak fail, and soobin feels satisfaction rear up inside of him at his incoherence. he’s making him feel this good - so good that he can only moan, overwhelmed with pleasure, mouth hanging open. drool slides down his chin, unnoticed by the younger. soobin feels his underwear tighten inexplicably.

soon, kai begins to curl forwards on the bed, grip tightening infinitesimally on soobin’s wrists as his thighs shake where they’re still pulled up to his chest. he’s moaning like a whore, loud and whiny, eyes glazed over. then, his brows furrow and his gaze focusses on soobin, suddenly panicked.

“w-wait, i - ah - oh _no_ , sir i-i - wait, _sir, please, i’m gonna pee_ , you have t-to - _oh_ \- to stop, i’m - _ah_ -”

soobin continues to tug on kai’s cock, pace unrelenting. “it’s okay; it’s alright, precious, just let go. let go for sir, my pretty darling.”

and, not two seconds after soobin had murmured words of reassurance to the writhing boy beneath him, kai seizes up, mouth dropping further as his toes curl in the air; a choked noise leaves him as his eyes roll back and his tongue lolls out over his bottom lip, more drool leaking onto his chin. he shakes, entire body twitching, and soobin doesn’t let up as kai comes, white shooting over his stomach and chest. it seems to go on for forever, kai still whimpering, body jerking, even after the first wave of intense pleasure; his eyes shine with tears as soobin milks his cock, pace slowing as he squeezes the last drops from the head. kai lets out what sounds like a sob, and his legs twitch as if wanting to close around soobin’s hands - but then, he goes limp; both arms and thighs falling to the mattress, head lolling back onto the pillow, leaving him spent; open; helpless to soobin’s lingering touches.

“sir…”

it’s quiet, kai’s voice, almost a whisper, but soobin hears the hint of a whine in it and looks up to see kai pouting; then, there’s a sniffle, and all at once soobin’s hands are clean with a click on his fingers and he’s leaning over kai, stroking his cheek gently.

“precious, are you alright? talk to me, little one, tell me how you’re feeling.”

kai blinks up at him. once, twice, three times: and slowly, very slowly, as if it takes all of his effort just to close and open his eyelids.

“mm,” he manages. “sir.”

“yes, i’m here. sir is here.” soobin reassures quietly as he carefully reaches behind him with the hand that isn’t stroking kai’s face to wave impatiently at the blanket, causing it to slither up over the both of them at soobin’s command.

“need…” kai mumbles, eyes drooping.

“what is it, precious? what do you need?” soobin murmurs.

“need...cuddle.” is what kai finally manages to say, voice barely audible; but he somehow manages to muster up enough energy to look up at soobin with the biggest puppy eyes he has ever witnessed, and soobin caves faster than tissue paper in the rain.

“of course, my darling,” soobin says, voice unbearably fond, gathering up kai in his arms and positioning them on their sides beneath the blanket, kai’s head tucked safely under his chin. he places a kiss atop the younger’s head, and feels him snuggle closer, hands coming up to cling onto soobin’s t-shirt feebly.

“sleep now, my pretty darling,” soobin mumbles into kai’s hair, fingers carding through the soft locks. “i will be here when you wake up.”

and, feeling completely and utterly safe for the first time in his life, kai sleeps.


End file.
